Impact —Part 1

Death affects us all, sometimes through illness, sometimes suddenly. The questions arise, “What am I going to do with the time that I have?” “How am I going to impact the lives of those around me?” “How can I be a blessing or a safety for those I meet or know intimately?” I have been thinking about this a lot lately.

Our school recently had our biannual school sports program.

As teachers, my colleagues and I were busy.

At one point, I interacted with one of the teachers as she moved around. I could tell that her mind was distant, and her eyes looked sad, a far cry from her normal demeanor. I longed to ask her if she was OK, but it was neither the time nor the place. I told myself that I would talk to her the next day. But she wasn’t at school the next day.

We assumed she was exhausted. Two days later, I awakened at four thirty in the morning to find I had missed several phone calls. I returned the calls and received news that forever changed my view of the world.

Our colleague had been found murdered, along with her eldest daughter and two others. Disbelief, shock, and sorrow all washed over me.

Anger came next. Later, I would experience fear as a woman living in a world where women were seen as expendable. There were two more murders that same week; women killed in domestic violence disputes. But the death of our colleague tormented all of us in the staff room and haunted me because I will forever ask, “What could I have done? What if I had asked her if she was all right that day? Would it have made a difference today?” As women, many of us live in unsafe situations. Some of us hide it so well that we fool those around us into thinking we are OK. God has given us eyes to see not just the immediate but also the hidden—if we would just look. We are to be our sisters’ keeper.

We cannot assume that everything is well just because we see a smile. We cannot be so wrapped up in our own woes that we miss the signs of distress.

It takes so little to genuinely ask, “Are you OK?” It doesn’t take much to reach out and show concern. These simple acts of caring and kindness can make all the difference. Let us not experience the pain and regret of wondering, What if I had...? Let us trust God when He prompts us to make sure a friend is OK.

Greta Michelle Joachim-Fox-Dyett