As Surely as the Dawn

April is designated Parkinson’s Awareness month.

I did not know that before my husband was diagnosed with the disease several years ago. Now I know. I find myself dipping into seasons of grief that somehow always catch me by surprise. Parkinson’s is a beast, and that beast is consuming the one I love.

As I struggle to find a way through another season of sadness, I want to find balance in this difficult dance between hope and despair.

I want to live well in this broken old world, to make peace with what is—rather than living foolishly, hoping for what will never be. I have never subscribed to the notion that “if you believe it, you can achieve it.” No matter how hard I believe, visualize, or verbalize it, I will never be a size 8 again! My friends, those days are gone! The hard but lovely truth I am discovering is that in order to live with hope—to live well—we need to allow ourselves the space to grieve well: to sit within the sadness of loss and be fully present without rushing on, to cry, to ugly cry even, and feel the relief that comes with releasing the dam of tears we have been holding on to. I want to live well—with joy and hope. To live as someone who has been blessed.

And how blessed I am! But now, I am also learning to grieve well. Some days I do better at it than others. Today is a good day. And I have started to gather all the good days, to hold them close and savor the sweet hope they contain. I find it easier to live with hope when I keep this truth uppermost in my mind: “We have placed our hope in the living God, who is the Savior of all” (1 Timothy 4:10, GNT). Our hope is found not in feelings or emotions or encouraging experiences. Our hope is centered in a Person—and that Person is the Savior of all! When hope is slow to come, remember the wisdom of Hosea: “Let’s . . . learn about the LORD; he will come to us as surely as the dawn comes. He will come to us like rain, like the spring rain that waters the ground” (Hosea 6:2, 3, NCV). No matter how long or dark the night, the dawn will surely come! So, whatever season you are in right now, I pray you will know the hope found in Christ.

May He renew and strengthen you.

May your courage shine bright and your hope flourish like the flowers in spring.

Karen Pearson