Welcome Home, Children

The year my mother turned ninety-three was a challenging year for my siblings and me. Two weeks after her birthday celebration, Mother complained of severe abdominal pain. A CT scan revealed a malignant tumor at the base of the ascending colon. Coherent and alert, she made all the decisions for her care and signed the consent for surgery. Mother made it through the procedure, but complications with her lungs took her life three weeks later. My siblings and I had been able to Facetime with our mother while she was in the hospital, and as we monitored her progress, we booked a flight for her scheduled release date. We were devastated by her loss before we could fly home. The loss of a mother cannot be adequately explained. She was the reason for family reunions. We had planned a special celebration for her ninety-fifth birthday, and children, spouses, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren were preparing for an event that would not happen. After her death I found myself silent with grief.

When the Sabbath School teacher asked me to comment on the lesson, I refrained from speaking, which was unusual. The only outside commitment I accepted was to continue teaching nursing students. This became my solace and comfort as I battled depression. Sharing clinical scenarios of my mother’s case was my way of expressing my grief and loss, and the students learned how to make sense of evidenced clinical situations.

Elizabeth Kübler-Ross identified the five stages of grief as denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.* By God’s grace and mercy, I accepted the loss but desperately missed talking with my mother. Paul writes that “the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:7, NIV). I am so grateful for all the good things God has given: faithful parents who now rest in Jesus and the glorious hope in the resurrection morning when Jesus shall welcome all His children home. Then we will say, “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith” of Jesus (2 Timothy 4:7, NIV). On that day there will be no more sorrow, no more tears (see Revelation 21:4). Maranatha!

Edna Bacate Domingo

* Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, On Death and Dying: What the Dying Have to Teach Doctors, Nurses, Clergy, and Their Own Families (New York: Macmillan, 1969).