Rejoice! God Is in Control

One January, my husband of twenty-two years died after a long illness and much suffering and pain. We had five children, and four of them were teenagers at the time.

His illness had spanned more than ten years.

During that time, we lost our home in spite of filing bankruptcy in an attempt to keep it. We had depleted our savings and were barely surviving.

I found a job that provided enough income for the basics.

Sadly, at the time of his death, I did not have money to pay for his funeral.

I could not even attend the funeral, which was in another city, because I could not afford gas for the car. Additionally, the car’s tag had expired.

I had no insurance on the car, and my driver’s license had been suspended due to not having insurance. I asked my husband’s mother to determine how she wanted him buried. He was her son before he became my husband.

I also knew that he would have wanted to be close to his family.

I realize now that God gave me my children for such a time as this.

They were my motivation to keep going.

I had to provide for them. I had to comfort them.

I had to show them God, though often they were the ones who showed God to me. For each day that I cried, there was an angel who reminded me that tomorrow would still come. Encouragement came in the form of occasional, unexpected calls from loved ones and friends. Once, I received a call from a supermarket chain for an interview—though I had not applied to that branch for a job. I was offered the job and accepted it.

It kept me busy and allowed me to meet new people.

It provided me with an avenue of escape from my darkness.

The job also allowed me to purchase a car after my previous one had been repossessed following my husband’s death. And as I journeyed forward, I heard God’s voice say, “I know the plans that I have for you . . . plans for well-being, and not for calamity” (Jeremiah 29:11, ISV). It has been five years since my husband’s death. I received a promotion at work. I take cruises my husband and I had planned to take once we had retired. My children are all adults now. Looking back, I know it was God’s love and power that saved my family. Thank You, God, for Your mercy and grace.

Pauline E. Robinson