Happy Father’s Day

Since childhood, I have memories of preparing homemade cards for Mother’s Day. As I got older, I became more creative as I carefully planned and came up with ways to honor the mother figures in my life.

Father’s Day was more of a problem.

I was raised by a grandmother for most of my childhood because my own single mother lived far away, earning a living to support us.

Father’s Day rolled by year after year with no particular acknowledgment from me. Yet as I reflect, there were times (and not only on Father’s Day) when that missing element in my life was palpable. I saw friends and family members interact with their fathers, and the twinge of that missing factor in my life would return.

I had uncles who filled that missing role to some extent.

Also, in time, I had a stepfather on whom I could lavish the cards and creativity deserving of a father. I was brought up in a Christian home and knew many Scripture passages by heart even before I could read. I had repeated the Lord’s Prayer countless times, but “our Father” was still in heaven for me. When I was a child, that was where He stayed —maybe my guardian angel would have to substitute for an earthly dad? What is my point in describing this part of my childhood? Certainly not to have you join me in a pity party. Yet as different holidays come around, let us be more conscious of those for whom these holidays trigger sad memories and lonely times and those who may not be in a celebratory mindset. Let us ask God’s guidance for including them or giving them the space they need to be introspective and quiet while dealing with their emotions in their chosen ways. In our mindfulness of others, let us endeavor to respect their individuality.

While offering inclusive activities, may we allow them the option of accepting or refusing our well-meaning offer —without taking it personally.

As we endeavor to forge meaningful relationships in our lives, my prayer is that “the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:7, NIV).

Doreen Evans-Yorke